Prayers for Michael

[Katybarstool]

Thanks Scottie

I'll be sure to tell him 

Kathyx

[JannaLee]

Katie,

I'm worried about your flat batteries and praying for you to recharge when you can to avoid a meltdown!

Love to you and Michael.
Janna

[Katybarstool]

Thanks Janna

I've missed your postings. Have you been away?

I spent the most of 4 days resting, in bed - I think the meltdown began  I'm happy to say, I'm back at work. Physically, very slow, but mentally, much chirpier. I realized if I stayed at home any longer, I would fall into that black hole of depression.

So resting, and doing paperwork etc, but not walking very far.

Michael has not had his appointment yet. I will let you know as soon as I find anything out.

Kathyx

[JannaLee]

I've had way too much company this summer.  As soon as one herd leaves another seems to arrive.

Truly it is wearing me out.  Everyone says "a couple days" then they just will not leave!

I hate that I've turned into such a grump about house guests.  I hate Sjogren's for this.

Thinking of you feeling blue is distressing!  I hate Sjogren's for that too!  So many of us suffer from depression.  You have excellent self-awareness to sense it coming on and getting outta' the house even if you could use a little more rest.

Good on ya' Katy dear!  I think of you often.

Janna

[Katybarstool]

Janna

Maybe you make your house guests too comfortable? Could you say, if they plan to stay 3 days, 'Oh, on the 4th day I have promised to stay with a girlfriend', or something similar, to show they have to leave. It's not quite hoenst, but could be self preservation.

Hope you get some rest soon.

Kathyx

[JannaLee]

Dear Kathy,

We really think alike!  I DID say that to a lady who came for 4 days and ended up staying 12 BLOODY DAYS!!! 

When she called (out of the blue) to give me the good news (that she decided to come for a visit) I said it was not convenient for me because I was going to be out of town. 

She called back the next day to tell me she was wrong, it was really the week before I would be gone!

What the heck do you say to that!?

As the 4 days turned into 6 because her husband who was in Indiana with their motor home getting some minor repairs done called every night to tell us how slow it was going, I got more and more nervous. 

She finally said she would stay in my house while I was gone!

I ended up having to lie again and say my trip was cancelled because of business reasons.  Around day 10 I offered to drive her to Colorado from Minnesota because I was so miserable with her!  Luckily her niece invited her for a visit and her husband said it would cost more for him to pick her up here in their motor home than a plane ticket to the neice's house!

I got online pronto and made reservations! 

Honestly, this episode has ended our relationship.  She is not someone I can talk to because she argues her point till the bitter end. 

Anyways...I know I don't have very strong personal boundaries...but at the same time I resent that some people like to push and push...forcing me to put my fists up!  That is not how I want to live.  It is distinctly un-loving to take so much from a another person.

A week later my mother came and did the same exact same thing!  She initially said she was coming for 3 days...then after she got here I found out she was actually staying for 6!

In between all this my 2 sons (from college) have been coming and going with lots of their friends and girl friends.  I have loved every moment of these visits and they can last longer with no problem because the young people are so helpful and don't need me to entertain them.

Wow!  Thanks for the rant!  I know I have to get tough in the future to stop this kind of thing from happening and I can assure you I will.  My weak spot is getting caught off guard and having to think quickly! 

Janna

[Katybarstool]

Janna

It just seems that sometimes you can't win, doesn't it. Sometimes friends really overstep the mark, and that's such a shame. The best friends are those that don't make demands on your time or energy - and the ones that you can be totally honest with.

Since having poor health, I have lost several friends (and one sister) because they just do not understand my limitations - not all of the time, of course - which makes it even harder for them to understand.  I have one really good friend of 40 years - yes, we were at school together from the time we were 10. We have gone for years without seeing each other when the kids were young, but our friendship has never been stronger than it is now. I think that is because we enjoy each other's company, but have a mutual respect for each other's space. Friends like this are rare.

I hope you have had a pamper since your mum left. I love my mum (most days!), but we don't get on too well in the same house. We do best when we go away for girlie weekends.  However, we have booked a pilgramage to Rome with our church next April - now that will test more than my faith    

Relax and repair, and enjoy the youngsters while you can.

Kathyx

[JannaLee]

Thanks Kathy! 

[Magick]

Janna

It just seems that sometimes you can't win, doesn't it. Sometimes friends really overstep the mark, and that's such a shame. The best friends are those that don't make demands on your time or energy - and the ones that you can be totally honest with.

Since having poor health, I have lost several friends (and one sister) because they just do not understand my limitations - not all of the time, of course - which makes it even harder for them to understand.  I have one really good friend of 40 years - yes, we were at school together from the time we were 10. We have gone for years without seeing each other when the kids were young, but our friendship has never been stronger than it is now. I think that is because we enjoy each other's company, but have a mutual respect for each other's space. Friends like this are rare.


Kathyx

Hi Kathy,

I qoted this paragraph because it sums up so much of how I feel when it comes to this illness.  I lost my husband because "I wasn't fun anymore" when I became ill. I gained an unlikely new friend in my former mother-in-law, who was quite appalled at his treatment of me and touchingly concerned for my health and well-being.  It is tough when one looks outwardly okay but is going through what most of us here go through.  My ex-husband told folks that I was a drama queen and that it was all in my mind.  That's another of the reasons that I am grateful for this group - it is so nice to know that I am not alone. 

I hope the rest of your summer turns out okay,
Regards,
Rosie

[Katybarstool]

Hi Rosie

I'm glad that helped. I just needed to say that this forum has been my salvation. We KNOW what it is like to have unpredictable health and limitations, and while is is just part of who we are, sometimes it can be a big part. That's when we need empathy and friendship.  I have had both in the few months I have been involved, and feel so much more understood now.

The sun is shining here - I think summer may have arrived. I'm just going to feed the family and chill today.

Hope you have a good day too.

Kathyx

[JannaLee]

Rosie and Kathy,

I absolutely agree about the support and the necessity of this website!  I has meant so much to me!

Your "Drama Queen" sister,
Janna

[Katybarstool]

Hi gang

Just a bit of an update. Michael is due to have his colonoscopy on Friday.  He seems to be doing ok at the moment - I think having the baby has kept him on his toes, and too busy to worry too much. He brought Mia to show my work colleagues last week. One had not seen him for a year or so - she could not believe how thin he is. She said to me after he left, I don't want to worry you, but Michael just doesn't look good. I had to agree and was saddened, but it's good to get an opinion from someone who doesn't see him regularly. Anyway, we should have some new soon.  I will keep you posted.

Kathyx

[JannaLee]

Oh honey!  I hope they get to the bottom of this soon!

No pun intended!

Praying like mad,
Janna

[Scottietottie]

Will be thinking of Michael on Friday. You all need some answers. I hope it all goes smoothly and that he's bought some vaseline!

Take care - Scottie 

[lynnmarie219]

Prayers and positive thoughts for Michael on Friday from me as well! Please take care of yourself through all of this Kathy!