How to handle the holidays

[Judie P]

With the holidays comes more physical, mental and emotional output.  I would love to have the "holiday veterans" on this forum give us their tried and true methods of how to handle the holidays.  I think it would be good for the newbies as well as the rest of us to know what preparations, ideas, thoughts they have mastered in how all of us can get through the holidays better.  I know this forum is international, but there are plenty of holidays across the world from November to January.

We are one family so why not share our wisdom to each other.  Thanks.

[Joe S.]

Plan to have some one else host. If you can give them some money for food. While visiting, have a place to nap from the party. Reduce stress as much as possible. If the family goes bowling, find a place to rest and watch. Remember you can say "NO" to stressful activities.

[irish]

If you are having the party and maybe opening of gifts it is your prerogative to choose how you want to run the show.

We have a small family but everyone is so busy and stressed out in this day and age and the big meal was weighing everyone down. It was getting to me also and I was usually the one who was doing the cooking. Sooo, there was a vote and we order in pizza and split the cost. It works great! We have to order gluten free pizza for my son and grandson but that works out well.

Of course we use the paper plates which should be a standard no matter what is being served. There are some good study ones these days if you are serving the standard Christmas dinner. We also bring some desserts that aren't too heavy. We have also had an occasional holiday where we just had each family bring a dessert. The adult and kids liked that.

One thing I always did back when I was making the big meals and in not the best of health was to just stack the dishes. The DIL's would help put things away and then we could sit and visit. We usually opened gifts before we ate cause the kids couldn't wait. With the dishes stacked I would take all the time I needed to wash them up and put away. It took me 2-3 days most of the time with the good dishes that couldn't go in dishwasher and the pots and pans. I would soak a batch for a while and later wash them and then soak another bath. Figured I was not working and would rather spend time with the family.

Hope this helped a little. Irish

[SunshineDaydream]

+1 on having someone else host, lol.

If you have to host, start what you can as far in advance as you can. That way you can pace yourself and spread tasks out instead of trying doing a lot in a short amount of time. The latter will could definitely wear you out. Ask for help if you need it, either by having spouse/kids help clean before company arrives, set the table, or clean dishes afterward. If someone offers to contribute to the meal by bringing a side dish or dessert, or offers to clean or dry dishes after the meal, definitely take them up on the offer.

[Judie P]

Anyone do pot luck holiday dinners?  It seems to be catching interest here in the West (California).  One of my non-profit organizations are doing a pot luck annual meeting and winter party.  We are having everyone bring a pot luck seasonal dish.  The organization is providing the dinnerware, drinks and party favors.  We are keeping decorations simple by using a battery tea light in a frosted bag for ambiance.

Ditto on the having someone else host. Love the pizza idea, too!

[warmwaters]

If someone offers to help, say Yes!  Maybe they don't make mash potatoes the way you do, but it's something you don't have to do. If someone offers to bring food, accept it graciously. Many of us want things to be "just so", but for your own sake, let others help, and try not to freak out if things end up differently.

If you are hosting, make things ahead of time to make it easier to simply put things in the oven or microwave.  Delegate - ask your cousin to put the turkey in for you.

Feel free to take a break. If I don't take break in the afternoon, I'm usually a grumpy or weepy mess by early evening. So after we've had our meal, I go lay down for a while. There's plenty of things for others to do - they can watch TV, or play a game, or go for a walk, or put things away for you. Don't apologize, just say "Time for my nap. See you all in a bit".

Cut back. You probably don't have to have 4 kinds of desserts, 6 side dishes etc.  You don't have to decorate every corner of the house. Just put up the Christmas tree (which can be decorated over several days, depending on your energy level), and a few other things that will put you in the holiday mood.

Remember that this is supposed to be fun for you, too. What do you need from others to help make that true?

[SjoGirl]

Pace yourself. I start Christmas shopping in the summer and buy a little at a time, which helps financially and from a stress perspective.

Give up thinking you need to have a picture perfect holiday or have many decorations at all. The first few years that I was sick I didn't have the energy to do any decorating so we didn't have very many. What we did have was each other and lots of love, which is what the holidays should be about.

Allow yourself to watch a few holiday movies, listen to some music, do things you enjoy.

Take care about parties with lots of food and drink if your are following a specific diet. Cheating some is fine, but too much, along with stress of being social, can send you into a tail spin.

Most of all focus if you are able on being grateful for what you do have rather than what SjS may have taken from you.

Peace and joy to you.

[Scottietottie]

Hi 

I persuaded most of my family to have Amazon wishlists. They list things that they want and I go online and select something. (I go via Sjogren's world and so donate to the site through any purchases I make)

People get a gift they actually want and Amazon takes care of the postage. Works for me.

Take care - Scottie 

[Deb 27]

Judie, I think the hardest thing for some of us is to let go of what we used to be able to do.  I had to put my foot down and tell my husband no to all the parties he likes giving and he got over it.  I never know from day to day or week to week. Also, if we host something, I keep it real simple, ask everyone to bring a dish and have my hubby do a lot of work as well. I keep it real simple anymore. 

We have to take care of ourselves first b/c nobody else is going to do it for us-:)))

Hope you have wonderful holidays!!!