my board and care update!!!

[Cassi307]

Irish,
I am sorry to hear about your husband's health but it sounds like he wants to continue to live life on his terms it has to be hard to watch him struggle with his health. It also sounds like you guys have had an amazing marriage. What a gift to be in a loving relationship so long.

Sending support your way.

[engy]

Irish,
What a strong-willed man your hubby is!

And what a wonderful wife he has to take care of him and still let him be who he has to be!

Take care & I hope Mr. Irish takes a day off yard work soon for some much deserved fishing!

[irish]

Engy, Hubby just went fishing for a week with some friends plus our oldest son who sort of kept an eye on dad plus did his nebulizers. It was his last fishing trip and he came home in increased heart failure. It was a very hard trip for him and very emotional as he told his friends it would be his last trip. This is the first time he has showed this kind of acceptance of his health status.

It is very hard to watch a spouse with chronic health issues that continually cause decline in health status. He has almost died 5 times and the constant stress sure keeps us on our toes. We know that some day an "event" will be the last one. Until then he will keep going as much as he can.Sometimes he can hardly walk 25 feet and then he will improve. Hard to keep track of the interaction of COPD and CHF. They have so many symptoms that co-mingle. Thanks for your remarks. Irish

[engy]

Irish,
I'm glad your hubby had a fishing trip with your son & friends. I'm very sorry it was his last.

I'm sorry he is having such a hard time & I'm sure it is difficult for you too.

You are both an inspiration for me.

Blessings, engy

[quietdynamics]

Hello Irish..Yes, it is very difficult to watch and feel helpless...but a touch and a word is so powerful, comforting. Just to see them smile. My Dad would drive my mother crazy when he wanted to do something physical around the house, but she let him..LOL Then he took a nap, and she could de-stress.

Oh my goodness a fishing trip... and with his son...such a wonderful gift for you husband and son, friends. Amazing!

Prays of strength and calm to you

[Cricket]

Irish

Good he had a fishing trip!  As we age it sure pops up in our mind a lot of dying, it has for me. I guess that is the way life is.  But I am not going without a fight.  Sounds like you and hubby aren't either, you are one tough lady!

Prayers for both of you and lots og hugs!
Cricket~

[lighthouse33]

A Boy and His Dad

Edgar A. Guest (from When Day Is Done, 1921)

A boy and his dad on a fishing-trip?
There is a glorious fellowship!
Father and son and the open sky
And the white clouds lazily drifting by
And the laughing stream as it runs along
With the clicking reel like a martial song,
And the father teaching the youngster gay
How to land a fish in the sportsman?s way.

I fancy I hear them talking there
In an open boat, and the speech is fair;
And the boy is learning the ways of men
From the finest man in his youthful ken.
Kings, to the youngster, cannot compare
With the gentle father who?s with him there.
And the greatest mind of the human race
Not for one minute could take his place.

Which is happier, man or boy?
The soul of the father is steeped in joy,
For he?s finding out, to his heart?s delight,
That his son is fit for the future fight.
He is learning the glorious depths of him,
And the thoughts he thinks and his every whim,
And he shall discover, when night comes on,
How close he has grown to his little son.

A boy and his dad on a fishing-trip?
Oh, I envy them, as I see them there
Under the sky in the open air,
For out of the old, old long-ago
Come the summer days that I used to know,
When I learned life?s truths from my father?s lips
As I shared the joy of his fishing-trips?
Builders of life?s companionship!

[irish]

Thank you all for the words of support and thank you lighthouse for that nice poem. It was so good that this son could go fishing with his dad as he hasn't been around much over the years. He is now though as he is living with us. Thanks again all. Irish

[susanep]

Irish, I am so sorry for all the tough times you and your hubby are having to go through. I said a prayer for both of you.

I don't know how we put one foot in front of the other sometimes. The stress is something we sometimes don't even know what to do with it all. We know we are not suppose to have a lot of stress, but life is stressful.

We lost our big white cat Charlie last week, and now I realize that two of our dogs are getting at that age, and have just been closing that part off, because I am tired of things (people and animals) dying.

I am always thinking of you guys both in your home, and all on the board here, as me and my husband keep plugging away one day at a time.

As you said too, the world is a mess, and I don't see it getting better. lol... But, I am thankful for today, and each day we are given. I can tell I am really going down in my energy (is that what it is called? hehe), and all the other symptoms or whatever.

As is popular to say these days. It is what it is....

go irish go  ....   go irish go  ....    go irish go  ..... 

susanep

[slccom]

Oh, Irish, what a bittersweet story and trip. Prayers and blessings to all of you.

Hugs, Sharon

[Meld256]

Irish,

I'm at a loss for words today, thinking how to encourage you and let you know how much we love you.

Darn brain fogginess...Others have said just what I would like to express. I know how hard it is to see your husband decline and yet he still has determination and a bit of stubborness. It's good to hear your son is around now to help out and spend time with him and support you.

Keep hanging in there, my dear, and please know that so many of us are thinking of you and your family daily.
Many hugs,
Melinda

[Carolina]

Ah dear Irish,

We have our younger son (43 on Saturday) living with us while he sorts out his marriage.

From Thursday to Sunday afternoon we also had his three kids and the dog.

They'll all be back for Tuesday through Thursday, with the dog.   Saturday we're taking the kids and son (sans dog, thank goodness) with us to the beach and a big family clan gathering.

Today the kids and the dog are with their mother, and I am spending the entire day recovering.

Last night we were invited out to dinner, and while we were gone our son cleaned the house, unloaded the dishwasher and dried and folded our laundry!

That gave me a day to recover today.

He is also helping to pay for housecleaning, weekly, which is another blessing.   And contributing towards groceries generously.

However, the relationships are, as you can well image, very stressed right now, and the strains on my almost 51 year marriage are really showing up, of course.

At some point down the line, when he has a clearer idea of how things are going, he will get his own place, but for now it makes sense for him to be with us.  We have a lovely neighborhood pool, room (almost) for the kids and dog, and it helps everyone to have more adults around.

Still, I have to pace myself, and I'm so grateful for a day with no kids.

The kids are 6, 11 and 14, and the older boy is very difficult for a variety of reasons.  He's very very bright, but socially inept and at 6'2" plus, he takes up a lot of room emotionally and physically.  Of course, he would be happy to bury himself in a computer, but that isn't a good option, so we are trying to manage good options, good food, and our sanity!

I am working at sanity and realizing that I'm not in charge of the world, even my own small part.

Do keep us posted on what your situation is like!

Hugs

Elaine