Does anyone's family/friends tell you they want to go over your meds?

[eyeamdry]

I think this might happen frequently to those of us who take multiple meds.  My husband talked to a former neighbor the other night at the grocery store.  I was not there, but in the nail salon.  This woman's husband had alzheimers, dementia and whatever else.  She is also insane and talks a mile-a-minute whether you want to listen or not.  She loves my husband because she has someone to talk to and he'll listen.  He told me "I wish you could talk to her, she knows a lot about medicine."  Now, I can guarantee you this woman knows no more about medicine than I do--and probably not as much about what's wrong with me. 

Her husband has our GP as his dr and the wife was telling how they "took him off all meds, or most of them and he is doing a lot better."  Well, I doubt this is the case and I could have my husband committed for listening to her.  So, he thinks I should talk to her.  A lady who has a crew cut (really) who used to own a neighborhood pharmacy?  I always think they are insuating that if you stopped 1/;2 or all of your meds that you'd be fine.

Tonight on the phone talking to my daughter, she wanted to know the name of my meds "so she could look up the interactions."  Well, heck, I can do that and often do.  I take some that contradict another one I take, but that's up to the docs to decide.  I told her it was none of her business and maybe sometime she is at the house we can do that.  I had told her I slept most of the day after being at the eye drs for two hours this morning.  I had the field vision test and the eye dilation.  My eyes were sore and still are.  I think because I sleep a lot, she is curious as to my meds.  She is not a nurse or anything else. What do you folks do when people start nosing around into your medicines etc?  We pay our doctors well to over see all this.  But let some nutty lady former hardware store owner sound like she knows something and I should all of a sudden "have a talk with her."  Any help appreciated.  Lucy

[irish]

Lucy, I hear where you are coming from. There are always those self serving people who think they have the answer to other peoples problems.

With that being said, I will tell you that after working in geriatric for 24 years it is true that many times the docs will review medications and either decrease dosage or stop a med altogether and find that a patient is less confused and more social, talkative, alert, .etc.

My hubby had to have his metoprolol decreased from 50 mgm twice a day to 25 twice a day. When we get older our liver doesn't metabolize our meds as well and it is really easy to get "toxic", stoned, confused, weak, low blood pressure, slower pulse, or whatever the heck else can happen to us.

I will also tell you that often the doctors are the last person to realize that you may be in trouble. That is because they see so many people who on meds, but they only see them every few months for 15 minutes or so and they don't see the total picture.-* The other thing that is really difficult is our telling a doc that we get really tired from a med. They just think, tired as wish I could lay down and take a nap when, in fact, we are speaking of so tired that we sleep all day or almost fall asleep driving. A picture is really worth a thousand words cause words don't do us justice.

Often times the best person to talk to is our pharmacist or maybe a nurse who happens to be good at assessing drugs. There are some doctors out there who are internists(whatever) plus pharmacists or some other subspecialty. Medications can really make us so much worse. They are good when used correctly but dangerous when things get out of control.

When I was working the docs would come and take some of the old patients off all their medications cause they just felt that they were not "thriving" or doing well. You would be amazed to see that many of them perked up and lived a few more years. Goes to show you that our body does change as does our need for meds.

I do not advise anyone stopping their meds---especially the heart and blood pressure meds. If you think that you are on too many meds talk with your doctor. Many times they will agree to try to decrease one pill a little at a time and see how things go. It can take time, but may be worth it.

Lucy, I guess I would just avoid that neighbor woman---she sounds a little noisy to me. Besides, as you said, she isn't your doctor!!!! Good luck. I hope things work out. Irish

[Nancy60]

Lucy,

I agree with all that Irish has said.

As far as your family goes, it really depends on the family member if you feel they are being supportive etc...I myself wouldn't have a problem of providing a list of my medications, but I wouldn't make any changes without discussing it with my doctor and getting his OK first.  Maybe you need to make that clear to your daughter and husband.  Maybe take them along to an appointment to talk about each of your meds and why you are taking them.  It really depends on the person though and what their intentions are.  If I felt that they were just being nosey and wanting to interfer/not be involved in the team of my doctor and myself, I would probably do just as you said and tell them it was none of their business. 

Nancy

[Scottietottie]

Hi 

I actually find the exact opposite with my family. They are not remotely interested in my meds. I had to get my hubby to fill my pill box back at the end of the summer when I broke my arm and he couldn't do it without me looking over his shoulder.

I know what medication he takes - and what it's for - but he still doesn't know what I take or why.

The kids don't know either.

Take care - Scottie 

[Katybarstool]

Hi Folks

I agree with everything you say, but I've had a similar discussion with my son, Michael, today about his meds. Just some background: he has had fibromyalgia for around 12 years, and generally manages pretty well, although he's had one or two major flares. He's currently in a flare, and is in agony. He's done the round of GP and ER and finally got a doctor to listen. This doctor thinks he may also have ME. She's done allsorts of blood tests, and is awaiting the results, before sending him to a specilaist unit.

However, today MIchael told me he has started having ringing in his ears. To my knowledge, he's taking

Co-codamol
Naproxen
Tramadol
Amitriptyline
Prozac
Nifedepine

The Prozac and Naproxen have recently been added, so are probably not at optimum level yet. However, being unwell, I'm concerned he's not writing down when he has taken his tablets, and that the ear ringing may be because he has taken them too close together - that happened to me once with paracetamol. I can't persuade him to either have a daily pill box, or to write down exactly what he is taking and when.

Although I don't want to preach to him, or interfere with his meds, I am worried that he is in so much pain, he might be taking too many meds. But he's 30 now, and married and living away from home, so can choose whether to listen to me or not.

Roll on Monday, when his bloods should be back, and he can get the correct tretment, r a referral to a specialist.

Kathyx

[eyeamdry]

As I read back through the posts, it really dawns on me that this stuff is no one's business--unless they are caretaker and/or close relative and believe something to be wrong.  My husband will listen to anyone who has a tongue and likely believes everything they say.  I am trying to tell him that I do not appreciate HIM discussing my medical stuff with friends and neighbors.

The same goes for him.  He should keep his mouth shut and not discuss private matters with the neighbor lady with the crew cut.  I understand, again, how a close family member can be concerned and perhaps speak to you about it, but telling strangers is the pitts.  I've been told by older men something about their wives private stuff that I know the wife would not appreciate.  I have told them to please not discuss their wives health problems with me and I'm sure their wife would not like it.

People are into others' business too much these days.  This is not a good thing.  I don't want the whole neighborhood knowing all my stuff and in return, I don't want to hear about their problems.  Too many people do not have a full life and live off the details of others lives.  :-)

[Katybarstool]

Lucy, I agree with you. When I took my mum to Rome a few years ago, I was having bladder problems. Returning from yet another trip to the toilet, I found her telling a group from our coach that I was self-catheterising, and giving them information about my forthcoming surgery. I was so embarrassed.

Hugs
Kathyx 

[eija]

Lucy, I'm so sorry. I would have a hissy fit for something like that 
Actually e.g. my hubby is so much "interested" in my meds that once, when I started a new med with possibly very serious side effect and asked him to read the stuff that comes with the meds - he never bothered! 

[Katybarstool]

Eija

My hubby is the same. I don't think it's deliberate, but if it doesn't effect them, some people don't want to know about our SJS or treatiments. That doesn'nt mean they don't care - I think my hubby just finds it all a bit bewildering - but he supports me, and is always there for me.

Kathyx

[meow]

My husband doesn't even notice. How he doesn't notice the pile of Rx in the bathroom and kitchen, I have no idea. Unless I am lying on the couch, dying, he just doesn't see it.

Today I woke up fine, and at about 11 am, I felt like someone ran over me with an 18 wheeler. I could lie on the floor and go to sleep right now, no problem. I amhoping I am not getting sick. Drinking some coffee and taking a walk around the building to wake up--that usually works if it's just tired. We'll see. I already emailed hubby and told him it's leftovers tonight.

[eija]

Eija

My hubby is the same. I don't think it's deliberate, but if it doesn't effect them, some people don't want to know about our SJS or treatiments. That doesn'nt mean they don't care - I think my hubby just finds it all a bit bewildering - but he supports me, and is always there for me.

Kathyx

Kathy - exactly. And the next time with such a med I know to read the slip to him myself 

Meow - so sorry, hope you feel better real soon!

[meow]

Two days of waiting for the other shoe to drop--- the flu? A flare?...and I'm fine now. I guess something was trying to catch me, but I got away!

[Madison Granny]

I'm glad you got away.  Mine caught me.  I had what I think was a cold for over a week and just when it was over my Sjogren's flared.  I thought I was really better so I went ahead with my dental work and boy was that a mistake.  I went into another flare.  All of it seems to be over now.

[meow]

Poor you!

Scratchy throat today...ominous.

I was out shopping with my MIL Saturday, and the clerks that waited on us at both JCP and KMart had active cases of SARS or tuberculosis---nasty wet coughs. And the guy at the next table when we went for some grossly unhealthy, completely delicious giant burgers, he had pneumonia for sure!

The one at KMart was really gross. She had really long sleeves that covered her palms, and she would cough into her sleeve-covered palm, then hand out the change. I wanted to tell her, she should cough into the inside of her elbow, first of all, and  second of all, have a giant vat of hand sanitizer on her counter, for her and her customers!
#cooties

[bloodless]

I've been lectured twice by my boss to stop taking methotrexate. He said "If you keep taking that, we'll all be going to your funeral soon." His sister almost died from infections twice while taking it. He means well.I finally agreed I would ask my doc about an alternative.

My daughter and my sister wanted me to ask about an alternative too, so I asked. Alternatives are just as dangerous it turns out. The doc did point out that it's nice my boss cares that much. He said most patients don't have understanding and caring bosses.

One of my sons asked me if I've ever quit taking all my drugs to see if I'd feel better...I've tried skipping a few for a while and found out that was a bad idea.