Rage, mad, angry, hostile.........

[irish]

I have noticed that my temper is extremely short these past months. I will be exposed to something and I can feel myself just take off inside. I have to just hang on to stop from screaming, etc.

The first thing I started to wonder about was my thyroid meds. Turned out my TSH was 0.4 and I do just terrible when it is that low. I have had my meds decreased twice in the past 5 months. I am still running at 1.48 or so and wondering what is going on. Really reacting to change in meds in a different way lately.

The other thing that has me wondering is that I have not been feeling good and can't put my finger on it. I am having insomnia quite badly and am really exhausted. I even look exhausted when I look in the mirror. The good thing is that I have several doctors trying to figure out what it is so I figure if I keep on going to see them I may eventually find out why I feel more sick than usual.

There is truly difficulty with any medications that we take and that needs to be addressed when we have a personality change. I think Burnout can really do a job on us also. You would think that burnout is from a job that drives you too hard, etc. Well, I think that being chronically ill drives us too hard. We get to the end of our rope at times. Sometimes I feel like I need to just sleep for about a week to get rested up so I can cope better with all the stuff.

Speaking of flying off the handle, I will tell you what really sends me over the moon. Every time I get stuff in the mail from the insurance company or related to changes in medicare, insurance or changes at the clinics that I go to I could just cry. Seems like I have just caught up and sorted everything out and there is a new wrinkle. I think when we are ill for so long our brain loses its ability to deal with all this stuff. I have to wait until I feel like my brain can concertrate enough to handle the bookwork.

The other thing that I have trouble with is trying to explain all the medical insurance stuff to hubby or other people who are trying to figure it out. I feel like I am just too tired in my head to have to go through this one more time.

Boy, I am sure fun lately. Think I do need a nap. Wish I could take one. Sleep doesn't always come easily. Irish

[tired of it]

Ha  I lost the ability to deal with all this stuff long ago, its all a B**ch

[flutterfly]

 well...meds can do it...& NOT bein' on meds an do it! 

me i'm rageful just bein' fed up w/bein'held in this torture chamber of a body!

fustrate a peep 4 long 'nuff & i'll GUARANTEE they'll end up ragin' @ sum point or 'nother!!!

~*flutterfly...tryin'not ta be bent side←↑→ways mosta the time!*~

p.s. i don't take any meds but insulin/percacet/correctol/vitamins/& lotsa b.s. from well meanin'peeps!

[ktfabian]

I've been in a pretty good mood lately, which is a bit of a change for me. I am on steroid - medrol, 8mg one day, 4 the next as I'm weaning down - but I really don't think the steroids were responsible for my moods. In my case, it was frustration over my husband's and my economic situation (we are still in a recession at my house, despite what the politicians may say about the rest of the country!) and I get frustrated that I'm not able to wrok a full time job and there are no part time jobs out there that don't require you to be on your feet for 6-8 hours. I would LOVE to take some of the financial burden off my husband's shoulders, but I can't find a job, and the bills come every day and we play the shuffling game. We've been at this for 18 years, since I first injured my back. I needed emergency surgery twice, and after the second time, couldn't handle being back at work. That's my stress and bad mood maker!

Menopause didn't help. You would have gotten whiplash trying to stay up with my mood swings. Had to have a total hysterectomy, and all of the bad symptoms went away.

I agree that you need to approach your cousin and ask her if she's alright. Maybe there's a new or bigger stress in her life that's causing the change. She definitely needs to speak with her doctor - the sooner the better.


My best wishes to both of you,
Tracy

[Carebear]

Hi Season,

My first thought was that your cousin's mood may be affected by a medication she is taking, like others have said.  Even Plaquenil can alter your mood.

You sound like you are close to her, so I bet you could have a heart to heart with her to express your concern.

She's lucky she has you.   

[Nathan]

Besides everything that previous posters have covered, low levels of steroids (cortisol) can cause a bit of an emotion lability... inability to control your feelings. If something angers you it just comes out.
Also another big one is poor sleep. I know Patience pretty much dissolves the less sleep I get. If I'm tired and am not able or allowed to sleep, I am not the best of company .

[Catilee2]

Dear Season,
      My opinion is yes they can.   After my husband had his shoulder surgery in Nov., he was prescribed Ambien to help him sleep. It made him feel like a very angry person. He has a short fuse anyway, but this was awful. Even the hydrocodone seenmd to make him a bit moody. He doesn't take those kinds of meds, so he thought it was a reaction. His surgeon told him not to take the sleep medication when he explained how it made him feel.
      When I took Lyrica 6 years ago, I felt extremely euphoric( high - silly and giddy) the first 3 weeks on the medicine. The fourth week my legs swelled like balloons, so that was the end of that medication for me.  I also remember a a teenager having oral surgery and taking a pain medication that made me act nasty toward others. They had to change that medication.
   Like the others have suggested, Find out what meds she is taking and if the combination of any of them can cause mood changes. Durgs.com has a link to check drug interactions.  Good Luck.

Catilee 2

[irish]

I just remembered that after I had my ear surgery that involved getting close to the brain with a lot of work in that area, I was just a "you know what" after I woke up.

After I got home and thought about it I told my hubby that I had prednisone during the surgery and afterwards and I would bet that the dosages were higher than I normally take. That is probably the cause of that.

The lack of sleep and money are always a cause of a poor atitude and crabbiness no matter how hard we try to "keep the lid on it". IRish

[CAT1962]

Excuse the hijack, but Nathan brought up something about low cortisol being an issue...I just found out that mine are low. Maybe have that checked?

[season]

Thanks everyone for your replys. I did speak with my cousin and asked her how she was feeling today. She didn't really want to say a whole lot.

She said she didn't sleep except in 2 to 3 hour shifts which only added up to maybe 4 hours in a day and no more than 5 hours total. She has a lot of worries concerning her mother, family members, and being sick all the time.

I told her she needed to give herself a break and maybe get out of the house and go shopping or just anything to relax. She screamed at me that I didn't understand. I felt helpless and didn't linger very long. I told her that I loved her and call me if she needed to.

She is fifty-two. She doesn't take a lot of pain meds and she said that her blood pressure med is the same that she has taken for the last several years. She only takes steroids when she is in a flare.

I think maybe it could be a lack of sleep, and worrying. Just don't know what to think. I have seen broken dishes all over the floor, screaming curses for no reason at all, hostility towards anyone that is in her path at the wrong moment. Her husband said that sometimes she will get into the car and leave for hours that he doesn't know where she is at.

Thanks everyone. I just don't know what to do.

[tired of it]

Excuse the hijack, but Nathan brought up something about low cortisol being an issue...I just found out that mine are low. Maybe have that checked?

My cortisol has ALWAYS been low,, but no one seems to care much about it, I wonder if this cant be the cause of a lot of our muscle pain, one is low,, sets off a chain reaction, and the body goes nuts, had the TSH test,, said my adrenals are ok, I am assuming this is tied in with the low cortisol readings,, I recall getting a shot of something every half hour and then having blood drawn,, levels of something went up,, wasent cortisol,, it was something else

[lizzi]

           well,

              i am constantly aggitated,moody,anxious,bad tempered,basically i am a nightmare to be around,i know its because

              of my meds and my many conditions,i have wondered if maybe i was bi-polar too cos sometimes i go really

              hyper and giddy but my gp ssays its the meds

[dainbramage]

Season,
I did the samething for a couple months. My stress was out of control. I was out of control. I finally broke down a cried to my doctor who took it with stride and gave me sleep meds and anxiety meds. An RN called me once a week to check on me. I had to see the doctor for a good 3 months until I felt I could live again. I also saw a psych person and was able to cry out all my frustrations and not be judged. Now, I am off those meds. I do feel better. When I feel anxiety coming on I back away, but several things did go on during this time. My son was diagnosed with dyslexia (no one on my husband's side believed there was a problem, oh wait my husband has dyslexia too, we found this out) (yes I was childish and called them up an said NANANANA) and I got help for him. Problems were being solved and I had to stop being SUPERMOM.

[irish]

I remembered just now that I have been on the 10 antibiotics this year. That, along with the thyroid could most definitely cause me to have been so irritable. I have CNS effects from most of the antibiotics now. I can't take Levoquin at all anymore as I get to agitated and feel like crying all the time.

I haven't had an antibiotic pill orally now for almost 2 weeks and I have been sleeping better the past few nights. I have had to sleep sitting up in the recliner the past few nights because of the Benign Postural Vertigo. Have to try to keep the stones in the inner ear down in the right ear. Will sleep in my own bed tonight, but I have to sleep on my right side to try to keep the stones(calcium bits, etc) in the right side of the inner ear on my deaf side.

If they stay on that side I will not get dizzy as I have no hearing or balance on that side. When you have no hearing or balance that was surgically destroyed and suffer from the BPV doc told me it is a "no brainer" to figure out where the stones are. They have to be on the "good" side---and they were!! I can't imagine that I can keep them in that place all the time and would bet that I will have to learn the moves to get the stones to move back to the deaf side.

I did a google and found out that any surgery they do to remove these little stones make for a certain risk of deafness---can't lose my good ear yet. Irish

[BonusMom]

Season-
Your cousin probably feels that no one understands where she's at and what she's feeling because, in all likelihood, she may not understand it herself.

Last year was a tough year for me. How I wish my best friend had persisted and called me regularly instead of telling me "I didn't know what to do for you.". When we finally talked, I told her she should have asked me. I would have told her.  She should have called me. Now, we are no longer friends.  We exchanged Christmas cards. She sent me a birthday card, but when I called to thank her on a Saturday, the call went to voicemail.  Two days later, she emailed me at work (we now work in the same bldg after knowing each other some 24 years) and said she wasn't ignoring me, just "too busy" to talk or return my call over the weekend (she's single and her daughter was at her Dad's that weekend) This, after not talking/emailing/texting for nearly three months.  It still hurts.

Perhaps you could explain your concern to your cousin for her well being-having seen the broken dishes, outbursts, etc.  Maybe the husband needs to talk to your cousin's doctor.  If things continue maybe an intervention of sorts with a mental health professional may be in order.

Reassure your cousin that your care and concern is coming from a place of love.  Eventually, she'll (hopefully) realize how much you  love her and want her to be well.

Others are right, your cousin is lucky to have you.