Getting spouse on board...

[grammad97]

Wisconsin41-
You said your wife is a real sweetheart. Even if she is not asking you how you feel; or how you cope or anything about your autoimmune she isthere.
Some people don't talk much but that doesn't mean they don't care. I have supportive husband but we don't discuss my health much. He sees me struggle daily and it frustrates him that he cant fix it. He is my biggest advocate if I have a difficult doctor. He will go to the next appointment and quiz doc on why he doesn't do or does do treatments.
He listens when I share but he doesn't ask. I don't let it bother me because I understand him and know his reaction to all things health related.
Engage your wide in a conversation about her thoughts on your illness and tell her what you would like or need her to do for you. We can know our spouses well but we cant read their mind.
best wishes to you.

[OT]

I love everyone's comments, very well spoken. I agree on so many levels that it is hard to cope with a disease that can make you feel terrible, but even harder to feel like you have no one to talk to that understands. Hence, the reason why most of us turn to this forum.


My husband has stated once that he too is scared to see me go thru this and worried what the future will bring. He doesn't want me to feel bad and be frustrated. He does try really hard to help with as much as he can and be there to listen, which is great. Wisconsin41, I too have young ones which can be hard because your busy all the time and I'm sure it can be hard for our spouses at times when things are hectic to stop for a moment to think about the way we are feeling or what we are going thru.

I think once you have a more definitive dx and plan for treatment, you might feel more reassured and feel like you can discuss things better with your wife.


I do agree having your spouse come to the doctors appointment is helpful and "date night" are alway a good thing!