Parenthood: Chapter 16

[Bucky]

Irish - our son has bought his own vehicle, so I think that will make a difference versus just being handed a vehicle.  It always seems to make a big difference if it's YOUR money that pays for it!   

There have been times when our son wanted to eat lunch out and I'd ask, "are you paying?" . . . then, eating at home didn't sound so bad after all!  LOL   

There are a few car ownership issues that my hubby and I have to iron out between us.  I too, had to pay my own insurance and gas when I got my drivers license and I think our son should too.  Hubby . . . not so much.     (Probably, because his mom paid his!)

Granted, our son doesn't have a job yet . . . although the application is sitting here on the table waiting to be filled out. 

I've mentioned to our son that until he gets a paying job so he can pay to fill up his vehicle with gas, that he isn't just going to hop in the vehicle and drive around just to be driving around!  As we all know, gas isn't cheap!  I've also told him that unless he has an after school activity, he can ride the school bus that comes right past our house and is FREE!  (Of course, once you have your license - I guess this is sooooo not cool.  So sad, too bad!   )

It's interesting to compare how I was raised with how my husband was raised.  In most instances we were raised the same way - in other ways, his mom babied him.  This is not to be confused on my part where I worry about our son . . . that's just me being a Mom! 

I know about the apron strings . . and I'm definitely not ready to sever them just yet.  I picture someone training a horse.  They have them on a lead rope while they teach them how to do whatever the trainer is trying to teach them.  Then, when the trainer feels the horse is ready - they unclip the lead rope and the horse is on it own.  (I'm not comparing our son to a horse . . but, you get the idea!  LOL)

In looking at my parenthood book - I've seen others who are in chapters 18, 21, Empty Nest, etc.  I know that as each new chapter is started that it means this young person you have nurtured through life is sprouting their own wings and getting ready to fly on their own.  Time is going by too quickly . . . I'm not ready for my little birdy to fly the nest.

Breathe . . . . Breathe . . . . Breathe.

Bucky

[A66eyroad]

Bucky, I love how you're comparing raising a child to chapters in a book. It's so true that everyone has to go through certain (what my husband calls) developmental stages. Your comparison to a horse also sounds like it's right on target.

Just as you wouldn't put a full refrigerator in a kids room so he can eat all he wants, it's my humble (but most accurate!) opinion that you shouldn't give a kid a car with all the gasoline he wants. I'm just sayin'. 

It sounds to me as though you've raised a very smart level-headed young man. As I said before, I think you can trust in his good judgement. I found that by telling my daughter how much I trusted her when she was driving, she tended to live up to my expectations.

In the end, all we can do is cover them with our love anyway. 

[Bucky]

Well . . . the Chapter 16  - new drivers license, is now entering another new phase.  Chapter 16 - new part-time job.

Our son has "worked" before - he detasseled corn one summer (which is hard work).  A seasonal job that he decided the following year that he didn't want to repeat.  LOL

There is still that cheshire grin on our sons face when he asks to drive somewhere and we give him the go ahead.   

With any new chapter - it may not be the ideal situation, but it's a start.  He starts work tonight . . . . at 10 p.m.!!     I know that's late - but, it's close to home - it's not snowing, and we've got to let him experience being a responsible young adult.  It's only for two hours of work tonight. 

There is a curfew for new drivers, but there is an allowance for work.

So, I will stay up until he gets home and have him call me when he leaves work so I know when to expect him home.

Breathe, breathe, breathe.

Bucky

[Scottietottie]

Hi 

I have to admit - I prefer the idea of kids with jobs to kids with driving licences but that's partly because in the UK no one is allowed a driving licence till they are 17 and I think that is going up to 18. Getting around tends to be easier here as its a small country and most places have reasonable public transport. (Not everywhere)

At least he'll be able to pay for his gas and jobs look good on resumees for the future! Neither of my boys worked at that age and both regretted it bitterly. both girlsd worked from the age of 14 and have never been stuck for work.

Take care - Scottie     (You've done a good job - now you gotta let them fly!)

[Bucky]

(You've done a good job - now you gotta let them fly!)

Thanks, Scottie!  We're trying.      
Bucky