Well, I had my bladder tumor removed. It turned out to be a whopper, not sure if it was big enough to get into the Guinness Book of Records, but the doc said it was large and could believe I was unaware of its presents for so long.
Naturally, anything I am involved in has to has some complications thrown in, like a huge blood clot that will not pass through the catheter. After being subjected to some mid evil like torture (some one jumping on your bladder and punching it) the doctor was summoned back to the hospital and I was once again put under and violated.
This time when I woke up I had two huge bags of water hanging over my head with tubes going in one section of the catheter and another tube exiting with blood a urine.
I couldn't hold any food or drink down for the first three days. It seems that morphine and my stomach are not compatible. The day I was supposed to go home, I was in the most agonizing pain in my like and could not stop moaning. The nurse called my doctor that night and got him to prescribe some Percosets, aah, finally some relief, some relief.
Friday afternoon I was kicked to the curb with a bottle of Percs for pain and my very own Pee bag! I didn't think I would survive the ride home but I did.
When I got home I found that my dog was very jealous of my new friend, the Pee bag. She started limping around the house yelping. My wife took her to the vet, who said she is faking it, there is nothing wrong with her leg.
Wednesday was the day to find out what I was make of, could I remove my own catheter? Well I did it, but I am not sure that my penis will ever forgive me.
Now my feet and ankles are swelling, a lot, so I went to the foot doctor for an injection in the ankle that would pull away some of the fluid that was settling in the feet. I am happy to report that they no longer look like bread dough.
Well, at least it has kept my mind off of the Sjogren's for a while, well I mean with having to go to the bathroom every half hour, you don't have time to think about much of anything else and believe me the thought of sex, never enters my mind.
Hi Epson!
Welcome home! Boy...you have been through the wringer haven't you? But I'm glad to hear that you are finally home and slowly on the mend. Please make sure that you rest as much as you can (in between bathroom trips of course ;) )....its always a little easier to do that in your home home rather than in the hospital though, isn't it?
Give your dog a little extra pat on the head so he doesn't get so jealous.....and please take good care and keep us updated when you feel up to it!
Welcome back Epson!
You will notice there was a thread in here wondering how you were doing. So glad to hear you are out anyway, if not recovered yet.
Take care, get some rest, get better, and keep in touch.
Genko
Epson,
Glad to hear your doing better. Sorry for the complications
Loved your up date. I had fun reading parts of it to my husband. ;D
Hope you continue to feel better. :)
kimbo
Hi Epson,
Glad to hear you haven't lost your sense of humor. Nice to hear you are back on the mend. Take care and keep us up to date on your recovery. Lots of people here have been praying for you and sending good thoughts your way.
Pooh
Hi Epson,
Glad to see you back with us man. I was gettig worried about ya.
I gotta say Kudos to you. I'm sure little Epson is probably not liking you very much right now what with a catheter and all pushed in him. I'm sure one day he will forgiv you but for now just treat him nice and gentle. ;)
I gotta say you are made of the tough stuff. Its bad enoough having surgery but when they start playing with the privates im sure it vioates some code of decency.
I'm glad you are home and can rest. If your puppy gets a bit too jealous. give him a little pee bag too. im sure he wont be jealous anymore.
Take care buddy
Pud
Hi Epson,
I'm so glad to see that your back home and none too worse for wear! ;) All kidding aside my friend, I'm glad that you're back home safe and somewhat sound. Hang in there night traveler, and I hope that you'll be feeling a lot better soon!
And please give that puppy an extra scratch for me will ya?
Take care of yourself and keep us updated, okay?
Patze
Hi Epson :)
Really good to see you again - we were worried about you!
I got my legs crossed just thinking about what you've been going through and I don't even have a penis!
I sympathise with your reaction to morphine. It makes me as sick as a dog and doesn't even seem to take the pain away. It just makes me incoherent and removes part of my mind that would normally deal with things!
Your dog sounds hilarious - and pretty bright!
Rest up. I hope you feel a lot better really soon and I hope the ordeal's well behind you.
Take care - Scottie :)
Good riddance to all that Epson, keep up the good work. As much as you have been through and "YOU" made "ME" smile today.
You need to write a book. I will buy the first 10 copies. There's all kinds of seriously, scarey and tremendously boring AI and chronic illness self help books, but if you could write down the experiances in your own words, which are a treasure, I think people would so much more be able to hear. For now just rest and keep us posted. Sandra
Well, a least the dog is feeling better, no more yelping or limping. I think I might have over dune things on friday and I am paying for it today. Back to being a couch potato, that must be why I am gaining weight, because I am not eating much.
The first time in my life that I can't stand to look at food and I am gaining weight, that's not right!
Epson, So glad to hear that you survived the surgery, blood clot and the ride home. The great "pee" bag is something that makes all mens heart tremble. My husband and one of our friends had bladder surgery this fall and they really commisserate about the catheters!!!!
Please take it easy. I know that is hard, but you have just been through a tough ordeal. Could be all the IV fluid you had in hospital is making you gain water weight. Docs may have to fine tune some meds for you. One solid food that goes fairly well after surgery and appetite loss is the old fashioned Malt-O-Meal cooked cereal. That is really soothing on the tummy. Also, the cream of wheat is good. Hope that you can get back on your feed. You did good to take out your own catheter. It is good that we can mamage some of these things on our own cause it is so hard to make a trip back to the doc. Take care and hope your wife gets some rest also. Whenever a spouse has surgery the other spouse gets pooped. Irish ;D
Hey Epson, something that helped my pop with his pee bag....I took a large circle of cloth as big as the bag and sewed it inside his robe like a pocket, and made a loop or two for the hose to stay in the correct position. It really helped him get around better and much less fear of the dreaded catching on a chair and pulling! :o Ouch! Hope you won't have to use the idea ever again but just so you know it worked pretty good. Sandra
Hi Epsom.
So glad to see you are safely back with us, and you can still be so funny!!
They say laughter is the best cure,so you should be up and running very soon..oh... and the loving will soon return too.
Stay well. best wishes Dolly
Hey Epsom,
Glad to hear you survived the surgery and are on the road to recovery, I think the word Catheter would make any man tremble with fear. It is nice to know you can keep up the humor while going through this horrible ordeal, you are a strong person. Hope you are feeling better quickly.
Collie
Epson,
I just finished reading your posts to my husband and adult son who alternated between wincing and laughing!
We all 3 send you our best wishes and cannot wait to hear in your next chapter that you are feeling better every day and also your little hypochondriac pooch!
Wishing wellness to you!
Janna
Yesterday I ventured out of the house on my own after doing a little vacuuming, getting bored. My trip was to the dentist, I think I failed to mention that I broke a tooth while in the hospital, Murphy's law.
I might have done too much, because last night I was in a lot of pain, a lot of pain. My wife was trying to talk be into going to the ER, but the thought of going back to the hospital just didn't set well, so a few hours after taking two Percs any laying in bed the pain subsided. This might be from overdoing or the harsh reality that I need to spend $450.00 on a root canal and $550.00 on a crown. I did feel some spasms in my wallet after my visit to the dentist.
Epson:
Welcome back!!! I see I'm late to this thread, but so glad to see you back and your wonderful sense of humor intact and the tumor gone!
Hope you (and your wallet) have a complete recovery soon!
Sue
Ow Epson - do be careful with yourself. I think I'd have been on your wife's side. Lots of pain - ER !!
Sorry to hear about your tooth. Talk about it never rains but pours.
Hope you - and your wallet - feel better soon!
Take care - Scottie :)
Sorry to hear about that tooth and the overdoing. I hope you will think twice before you try it again for a while.
Ah yes, the ole wallet spasms. I had one recently to the tune of $1250 only all I did was refill 3 of my prescriptions. It's enough to make you sick, if you weren't already. :(
I truly hope you are feeling better now, please take better care of yourself.
Pooh
You have my sympathy Epson! I sure know what those wallet spasms are like lately, aren't root canals and caps expensive? ::) Hang in there and hopefully this will be a one time only things for you!
Patze
Oh EPson.....glad to hear you are finally getting back to your old self. I hope you continue to recover and I will send a prayer your way!
Vicky
I'm glad you are feeling well enough to feel the pain in your hip pocket!
Best to you, sir!
Janna