What do you do when you are sad? I am just feeling a little sad today because I don't feel well, and have to be back at work instead of spending time with my daughter home from college. I used to be able to shake this off more easily, but today I just am sad. So I wonder what others do.
My husband's job was cut for budget reasons last month, so that has me a bit worried.
I hurt all over (including my face) so eating chocolate or taking a walk isn't great. Maybe I will sit outside and get some fresh air for a minute, and then blow off work early. I hate to use any more time though, because I need to be able to use time for FMLA hours so I can keep getting a full paycheck.
Sorry for some whining on here, but I don't want to go home to my family and bring them down.
Each day, I write down two to three things that are good and positive. Sometimes the things seem so minor and to some may not mean much to others, but to me, they keep me going. I never write a negative word. When I do this exercise, at first, I tend to struggle. But usually around the 5th day, or sometimes week two, I have a lot to write.
It goes with how I try to live my life. Around nothing but positive including the people I am friends with or movies that I watch. To be honest, I've even cut out siblings who were negative influences in my life. I don't need them draining the little energy I have from time to time.
There are things you wrote about that can be positive -
1- Your daughter is in college! Wonderful!
2 - Your husband is healthy and has time to do some things on your "honey do" list. :)
3 - Avoiding chocolate will help keep you from gaining 5 more pounds!
See, it isn't too hard. Hang in there!
I cry.
I try to watch some thing funny on TV or DVD. A gentle distraction can also help. It is hard to cry with dry eyes.
I grumble for a while and then I think, that's a waiste of time, precious time, and give myself the kick under my but and try to move on. But I need some grumble-time otherwise the kick won't work. And most people say, be great full what you have, and they are right. But sometimes you may grumble. For a short while. And then it will go better to move on. At least, so it does work for me.
Hopefully you will feel better soon! Take care @reallyneesanap!
Stans
Sometimes I wallow. I read a poem or listen to some sad songs or watch a DVD that will be sure to make me weep so I can have a really good cry.
Other times I talk to myself severely, count my blessings and get busy with emailing a friend, or reading a favourite book. If all else fails then going out for a trundle in my trusty wheelchair usually helps.
Hope your day improves really...
Take care - Chickpea
i also try to watch a funny sitcom.. i love three's company and older shows from the 70s and 80s so i try and record some of them that play in the middle of the night on tv land....and sometimes i pray -really hard and also making a list of what is good is a great idea-i try to do that more often but have a hard time ..hang in there... i am tired of my left eye now for 5 months bone dry-even after cautery-been to countless docs-they say the puncta is shut-its like my eye just got worse and my right eye got a lot better.. sjogrens is an odd rollercoaster disease for sure
This may sound really dumb of me..but when I'm down I go visit the nursing home...It gives me a reality check. I have a good friend in there with MS.
I love up my dogs. They love me unconditionally, no judgment. They need me, but they aren't pushy if I'm too tired or cold to take a walk - although I try for them almost every day.
KellyG
I wish I could cheer you up, but there will be these ups and downs. I keep trying to focus on the positive. I saw a 10 year old boy on tv with spinal stenosis and constant pain, plus he wears oxygen for breathing problems. The little guy had scars covering his back from failed surgeries, but he still loves to play. Go figure.
I cry too. It will give me a rotten headache but it helps to relieve some of the pressure that builds up from the stress of the sadness.
Also, I give myself a darn good talking to at times. I also pray a lot and that really helps.
Then if the sadness goes on and on and on it is time to get my antidepressants readjusted. There are times when too much stress in our lives knocks our brain chemicals our of whack and we just can't get back to where we should be on our own. Then we make an appt and ask for help!
Just a reminder for people that Christmas time is really one of the saddest times of the year for many people. I never understood that until my kids were gone and my health had gone down the tube. Now I have a really hard time with Christmas. I have to try hard to keep positive and I usually perk up after the first of the year.
I don't like being like this, but all I can do is go with the flow. When you get my age you think back to the really great Christmas's that you had and they seem so much better than the present. Very normal for us to think that the past experiences were better. Hey, many times they were cause life was less complicated---no computers, ipods, blueberries, kindles, cell phones!!! Irish ;D
I watch my favourite DVDs that put me in a good place, my favs are:
1. Vicar of Dibley
2. Phoenix Nights with Peter Kay
3. No Angels (UK series)
4. Carry on Films
Also, a hug from my little Kelpie dog does wonders for me - nothing like big ears, big brown eyes and smooch with my dog to make me feel better.
I pray and read my Bible
The Vicar of Dibley! No-no-no-no-no-YES! I love that show! :D
Quote from: A66eyroad on December 29, 2011, 05:24:41 AM
The Vicar of Dibley! No-no-no-no-no-YES! I love that show! :D
I love Alice and how she never gets the joke at the end.
Thank you to all of you who replied. I am feeling much better today. I loved all of the suggestions. I am not much of a crier except when I watch a sad movie, which I am avoiding like the plague!
I will see if I can get any of the UK movies online. I love some British humor, and find the accents soothing. No one seems to raise their voice with a British accent. LOL
I go from being sad to being angry and then I tell God His system sucks. I don't know if He's listening to me or my ideas on improving it. I'm thinking that since the world is still full of people suffering with incurable diseases ... He isn't listening.
I don't think I will yell at God. I want every day that I can get with the people I love and don't want to tempt any lightning bolts.
The Vicar of Dibley seems to be on YouTube so I think I will watch an episode when I get home today. Thanks for the suggestion, I sure hope to have a lot of laughs.
To anyone else who is having a sad day, remember that the feeling will pass. It is just when you are mired down in the muck that it seems so hard to get out of it.
Oh, and I discovered that laying on my bed, rolling around, and moaning ridiculously really made me feel better when I got my daughter to join in on the act. My husband thought we went nuts, but for some odd reason it let me acknowledge that I was in pain, but also let me make fun of it. Try it! LOL
For me, getting outside and seeing something natural helps. Just looking at a beautiful tree or smelling flowers, or watching a bird or squirrel are relaxing. They take me outside of myself for a few minutes and let me focus on something pleasant.
Of course there are some days when I just have to let my sadness happen, and not much will help, but I try to find some upside to the situation. But it's ok to be sad sometimes when there are things that making you unhappy. The trick seems to be not to dwell on them too long.
When I'm feeling sad I get my pictures of my Granddaughter Madison and look thru them. And then I call her and we act silly on the phone. She loves to play. I also love to watch the animals play around the yard especially the squirrel and birds the seem so care free.
Sometimes if I feel sad...I give myself permission to feel that way. Knowing that when I get out bed the next day, I had better have an improved outlook on life. ;)
It can, on occasion, be beneficial to acknowledge the physical and emotion pain we feel every day when we suffer from a chronic illness. Not to wallow. Just to surrender for a brief moment.
Mary Elven - I love the idea of rolling round on the bed in (real or mock) agony and making a huge fuss! Sometimes it all seems so ridiculous to me - the level of pain, inability to do ordinary things, amount of medication etc - that the only thing to do is laugh.
Did you watch The Vicar of Dibley? It's SO English, or rather what people outside the UK think is typically English I suppose. There are villages like that near where I live (in the south of England) but most of the houses are owned by weekenders from London. The original villagers can't afford to buy them any more. Still every community has an Alice I suppose!
It's good to hear that British accents can be soothing, but I'm afraid we do raise our voices too often! Never, ever watch TV coverage of debate in the House of Commons if you want to retain any myths about the gentility of the British!
Happy new year to everyone - Chickpea
I am going to watch my Dibley DVDs later on - I love Alice.
I don't cry much. Never have been one to cry easily. So if I do cry, my family freaks and gets really worried. Lately, when I feel so sad and do feel like I could cry, (the pain has brought me to this point) I take a deep breathe and shake it off. I don't want to freak them. ANd it would give me a headache. So I don't cry. I do get really sad though. I do whatever works at the moment to get past it. Most times I remind myself that there are others who have it worse than I. I remind myself of all the positive things that are in my life. I have many. I also remind myself that this pain can eventually get worse. So if I cry now, what will I do later. I hope you find a way to work through your sadness. Someone is always here in this forum to listen when you need. We understand how you feel.
Luna
I allow myself a designated period of time for my pity party (usually a day works). I prop myself up in bed & watch lifetime sappy movies. Also, I look through magazines or read.
Typically, a fair amount of chocolate is involved. I am usually good to go after I have disconnected from my reality for awhile ;)
I try to distract myself. Today it is working on designing a UFO. I would like to build it someday. With the patent information that I have found on electrogravity. If you do it correctly you can fly a brick. Tesla Motors, Pumps and Whomalsdorf high voltage generators. About 125,000 volts to lift off, 250,000 volts to fly and 5,000,000 to fly like the B2 stealth bomber.
Today I feel the need to have a good cry, except I am a bit impotent in the tear department. Oh well :(
Joe, you are the coolest dude! 8)
Years ago a built some models and did panels on the topic. The 8 foot model lifted 1200 pounds at 20 miles per hour. I demonstrated Ion laminar flow and zero point energy. It was fun until fibro sent me to bed and removed most of it from my head. I was lucky to have a paper on it so I have most of the background research. I think the PQQ has allowed me to start thinking on these topics again.
Corella,
I hope today is a better day. Obviously, I have been there. Watch the Vicar of Dibley! Or babies laughing on youtube.
My daughter found a youtube video with two brothers on it. You can find it by searching for "Charlie bit my finger". Now, when I feel a pain, I don't say "ouch" I say "Charlie". Silly, but it makes me smile.