Author Topic: Need input to my feeling overwhelmed.  (Read 8619 times)

Bucky

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Re: Need input to my feeling overwhelmed.
« Reply #30 on: November 04, 2014, 07:58:06 AM »
Susan - I echo Carebear's post.  I think your dad is where he needs to be right now with people who can watch over him and tend to his needs.  He will adjust when he is moved to a nursing home and it will also give him the opportunity to be around others his age. 

I know it's been a difficult decision for you and your sisters.  I think at some point in life, all of us are faced with similar decisions for our parents.  It doesn't make it any easier, but others of us have been in your shoes too.

I hope this will give you some peace of mind knowing dad isn't living by himself and that others will look after his care and the responsibility doesn't lie on your shoulders to physically take care of your dad.

You're a good daughter - you can be proud of that.

Hugs,
Bucky
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susanep

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Re: Need input to my feeling overwhelmed.
« Reply #31 on: November 04, 2014, 01:20:02 PM »
Thank you Bucky,

You are a very sweet person, as are all. Life is hard when these things roll around, but also each of us will face this too. I am not that far behind my dad. He is 82, and I am 62. He doesn't know yet, but me and one of my sisters will be together when dad finds out. I am glad my mother wasn't faced with this with dad. He will probably be transferred there later this week.
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A66eyroad

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Re: Need input to my feeling overwhelmed.
« Reply #32 on: November 05, 2014, 06:22:07 AM »
I worked as the bookkeeper in a nursing home many, many years ago, and I remember when a parent would be admitted and be very angry with their children, doctors, and the staff. The children, in turn, would be angry at the staff and at the nursing home and would yell at me -- or any other employee they could find. I would have to tell the family that anger is a pretty normal reaction to learning that the parent couldn't live on their own anymore. I had to have a pretty thick skin every day.

It is truly a sad thing that we have to have nursing homes, but it is also a sad thing that we have to have Sjogrens World Forums! But there is a need for nursing homes, just as there is a need for this forum. It's a sad truth, but it's one that we have to live with.

Not to make light of the situation, but my daughter was in grade school when I worked at the nursing home, and I came home one day after having to deal with an angry parent who was screaming at her children and at the nursing staff. I said to my daughter, "If the time should come, I want you to know that it will be okay for you to put me in a nursing home." And she answered, without blinking an eye, "Well, yes! Of course I will!"

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Katybarstool

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Re: Need input to my feeling overwhelmed.
« Reply #33 on: November 05, 2014, 12:29:06 PM »
Susan

I am so relieved that you have found a solution for your dad's situation. It must be so difficult for you, but not having to worry about him wandering at night, or falling and seriously hurting himself will, hopefully,  help you to have some peace of mind.

I will pray that your dad isn't too upset when he finds out, and that you and your sisters have the strength you need.

Wishing you all the very best

God bless.

Kathyx