Author Topic: Mr. Irish has passed on  (Read 24547 times)


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Mr. Irish has passed on
« on: April 16, 2014, 07:25:30 PM »
Just a quick note to tell you that my beloved hubby of nearly 50 years passed away at 3:45AM this morning. He had been in hospice for 3 months and as many of you know had autoimmune disease plus a primary immune deficiency. He also had right and Left sided heart failure, pulmonary hypertension, COPD and many other issues.

The past 3 months in hospice have been a blessing and we spent much of our time together talking, watching TV, and napping, etc. The past 3 weeks the downward decline started in earnest. I managed to get my infusion done on MOnday and had 2 hours sleep each night for several nights plus a nice benedryl nap at the infusion. Monday night when I got home his health declined and it was a long night. Tuesday night started out with the usual "terminal restlessness" as the hospice people call it--plus we had that full moon effect.

It was a hard, hard night of physical care and emotional suffering for both me and my dear daughter in law (the nurse next door) as we worked with hubby and medicated, held him, cried and sweat blood and tears. We could not get him comfortable and the amount of meds didn't seem to help. The hospice nurse came at 1 AM and stayed with us and helped get him more comfortable. He had finally fallen into a coma about 12 MN for which DIL and I were thankful. He did not pass away until early morning and it was not a pleasant passing. It was terribly upsetting to watch my dear hubby suffer when my goal was to keep him safe and comfortable. He had a rapid onset heart failure, pulmonary edema (fluid lungs) situation that did not kill him fast enough basically.

It is over, the load is off the shoulders of me and our 3 boys and families and our hearts are heavy. We know that hubby is safe and secure as our Christian faith has promised and that the suffering is over. I don't know when I will recover. I feel like I need to go to a place on the beach and watch the sun set for a month. Hubby thanked me over and over for my care and love. Our humor never left though. I told him one day while doing his toenails that I did't want to rub it in, but that I was saving him 98,000$ a year by taking care of him. (This is the latest estimate for yearly nursing home costs.) Hubby told me "And don't think that I don't appreciate it.".

We are going to give money donations in his honor to the Primary Immune Deficiency Foundation. Thank you for listening to me pour my heart out. I knew this day would come and have cried buckets of tears for months. It will always hurt to know that he isn't with me. He was my best friend. TAke care all and take care of spouses as they are indeed precious. Irish


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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #1 on: April 16, 2014, 07:31:40 PM »
So sorry for your loss. His suffering has ended but your loss is so great. Be kind to yourself, rest your weary body and know that you are cared for and prayed for on this board.


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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #2 on: April 16, 2014, 07:36:55 PM »
Irish, I am so truly very sorry for the loss of your husband and best friend. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Hugs and love,
Mary-Primary Sjogren' s, Hashimoto' s Auto Immune Thyroid, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Reynauds, and busy mom of 4 kiddos :)


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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #3 on: April 16, 2014, 07:39:40 PM »

I too am sorry for the loss if your husband and best friend. I also will keep you and your family in my Prayers

Hugs and Love

SJS-Primary; Hashi's, Post surgical hypothyroidism, Hypoparathyroidism, Spondylolithesis, L&C Facet Arthropathy, Fibro, gluten intolerance, TBI, Radiculopathies, Neuralgias, Osteopenia, GERD, Asthma, Allergies. Sphincter Dyssynergia. OSA, Fasciitis, Cervical Spondylosis, Cancer, etc etc etc

Joe S.

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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #4 on: April 16, 2014, 07:47:58 PM »
I am sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.
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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #5 on: April 16, 2014, 07:56:58 PM »
I am so sorry to hear this Irish. I hope you are surrounded in full by your loved ones right now, and that they are helping carry your heavy heart.

When all settles eventually, you should absolutely take yourself to the beach if you can, and watch those sunsets. You deserve it.


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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #6 on: April 16, 2014, 08:19:03 PM »
May his memory always be a blessing.  I am sorry Irish.  My thoughts and love are with you. 


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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #7 on: April 16, 2014, 09:30:24 PM »
I am very sorry for your loss, Irish. You are in my thoughts.

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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #8 on: April 17, 2014, 02:28:11 AM »
I read this and thought oh no. I am so sorry for the loss of your best friend, and precious husband. There are no words at a time like this. Come here, and unload all and anytime you need to. You and your family are in my prayers, and comfort given as only God can give.

You are loved irish,
God Bless my friend
susanep :'(
Sjogren's, Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Hypothyroid, Fibro, Sleep Apnea, Diabetes 2, Asthma, and Gerd.  (Meds I take) Omeprazole, Pilocarpine, Levothyroxine, Effexor, Cpap, Aspirin, Mobic, Prilosec,, Xanax, Restasis, Systane,Vitamin D3, Plaquenil, Gabapentin, Provigil , Advair, Nasonex, and Proventi


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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #9 on: April 17, 2014, 02:55:55 AM »
I am very sad for all of your loss. May you carry his love with you
Sarah xx
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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2014, 03:00:07 AM »
Dear Irish, and your loving family, I'm so sorry for your loss. I picture you watching the sunset, with your Beloved by your side in spirit. You've painted us such a beautiful picture of devotion and joy in life, and I thank you for sharing your journey.
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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #11 on: April 17, 2014, 03:03:10 AM »
So sorry for your loss. It's a two-way street. On the other hand it's a blessing that he doesn't have to suffer anymore, but then there's no way of not missing your loved one. I'm so sorry the end was difficult. But he is at Home now. Try to get some rest for yourself. My prayers are with you, too.

Female, 52, in Finland
Sjögren's, fibromyalgia, Hashimoto, depression, migraines, pressure urticaria, mild Raynaud's, MCS...
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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #12 on: April 17, 2014, 03:51:00 AM »
So sorry for you and your family Irish..not sure how did you did it all with being so ill yourself. Your husband was so lucky to have you.
Wish you some peace..

52 years old.Primary SS, Lupus, Raynauds, POTS, Hormone issues from Hyster-menopause, systemic candida,osteoporosis,Gastroparesis, chronic neuropathy, migraines, sinus/dental issues. selective immune def/low t-cells.
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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #13 on: April 17, 2014, 03:56:10 AM »
Oh Irish, I'm so sorry.  :'(
DX:Sjogrens w/mild Lupus overlap,Hashi,Celiac,Raynauds,Sm.Fiber Neuropathy,POTS,Fibro.,CFS,OI & other dysautonomia.
No thyroid
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Re: Mr. Irish has passed on
« Reply #14 on: April 17, 2014, 04:07:19 AM »
Dear Irish,

I am so sorry you lost the love of your life and your best friend.

He is in a better place now, and the pain is over,