Hi Rachel,
I'm late to this discussion, but I understand how hard this is to accept, adding a new medication like Methotrexate.
If you can tolerate it, it is certainly worth trying. Many people I know rely on it for a quality of life and relief from suffering and progression of their illnesses.
I do understand the resistance. I resisted the treatment I'm currently in progress with. Unfortunately the first two months of treatment produced such difficult side effects that we've had to change the product.
It is interesting to me that while it is the SAME treatment, different manufacturers prepare the treatment slightly differently, and evidently that can make the difference between difficult and increasing side effects and no or tolerable side effects.
I can still feel the resistance to the entire idea of the treatment, somewhere in my mind. In my case, no because of the nature of the treatment, but because of the horrendous cost of the treatment.
I don't have to pay the cost. Only about $4,000 of it per year. I couldn't do it if I had to pay the actual cost since is it $140,000 a year. And for some reason that number just upsets me. How can I be taking a treatment (it's a blood product, not a medicine, per se) that is so expensive?
I also am in the process of having my neurologist run tests to determine whether or not neck surgery will help my neurological problems. I am terrified of that surgery, and very resistant to it.
And yet, we must all change and come to terms with our quality of life issues.
Hugs, Elaine