The darkest days and does that mean a huge flare up

[Cricket]

I am so very sorry for your loss, my prayers are with you.

Please keep us posted on how you are doing
Cricket

[eyeamdry]

Dear Bopeep:  I can't imagine the anguish you are feeling right now.  I am so sorry of the untimely passing of your husband.  Be sure and try to take care of yourself.  Perhaps there are some young men who are neighbors and would know how to help you with the livestock.  Best to you.  Lucy

[BonusMom]

I am so saddened to hear of your loss, BoPeep.  Your hubby was so young, too young to be taken from you.  What a huge undertaking you have ahead of you, running the farm.  I do hope that family and/or neighboring farmers will lend a hand in the difficult times ahead.

Like CareBear, I recently lost my Dad and have not experienced a flare.  I don't know if it's a delayed reaction or what???  Could simply be the difference between losing a parent and losing a soulmate because I'm well aware that there IS a difference.

Please be kind and nurturing to yourself.  We'll be here when you need us.

[season]

I give you a warm, soft, comforting hug.

The grieving process can really be taxing on you physically and mentally. As this will take some time, you must take care of yourself even when you don't feel like it.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[irish]

Oh BoPeep, What a loss you have had. I can only imagine the pain you are feeling. I would think that you don't even know where to start. There is nothing that can take away your pain and grief.

I can only hope that there is someone to help you with all of the responsibility with the sheep. I don't know where you are on the calendar, but I would hope that lambing is either over or not due for a while. That is a very stressful time with a herd of sheep that big.

I am wondering if it might be wise for you to see your doctor to see if there is anything you can do to help your body deal with the stress. Your doc needs to at least know of these circumstances I would think.

Like the rest have said, do only what you have to do and try to rest. Is there someone that you respect who could offer advice on options regarding the future and your herd?? This will be a daunting issue that will necessitate investigation. Know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope that you are able to sleep. That is so important. Irish

[Sha]

Hugs and  are being sent to you!

Love ya!

Sha

[DryEyes]

BoPeep

My deepest of sympathies.  You and yours are in my thoughts and prayers .... 

[SueAnn]

I am so sorry for your loss,  my thoughts will be with you.

SueAnn

[anita]

Bopeep,

So very sorry for your loss.  Hold tight the memories you have with him.  Take this one day at a time.  He will be with you...always.

[Carolina]

Dearest BoPeep,

I just read your post this morning.

There are never words, only closeness and touches to help bear the sorrow and burden.

You, your heart, body, mind and spirit are one being and now you are bereft. 

You can't control the grieving, BoPeep,  or how you react in mind, body, heart and spirit.

I pray that there others, family, friends, neighbors who will step in now to help you.

Love,

Elaine

[Bopeep]

Thankyou all so much for your thoughts, prayers, and common sense suggestions.
Apart from all your messages and well wishes I have been amazed at who has just dropped on by and has offered to help. Even people I dont really know.
Thankfully here in NZ its mid summer and lambing is well over. Our stock agent arrived out here and helped me cull 100 sheep out to make the flock more manageable for me.He assured me that all our new little lambies weren't going to the works for slaughter, (as those of you that have had anything to do with farming will know by that comment that I have a lot of toughening up to do )

In NZ we dont have anything like the farm, or ranch support systems some of you talk about, which is in hind sight I think probably a good thing. I find it very hard to accept or ask for help from any one, and am a bit frightened I may come to rely on others too much and become a big pain in the neck.
I have been wondering if I shouldn't be trying to get in to see my specialist, then wonder what he could, do so disregard the idea.
People tell me that the worst of it is over, as today we buried my darling Bill, but in the wee hours of the morning as it is now it doesnt seem better.
I know I have to keep eating and resting, but my body is telling me otherwise. I cant sleep and as far as eating goes it just gets stuck in my throat. This is not a new thing, just one I havent addressed before. does anyone else have problems of food not wanting to pass the neck area, and is there something I can do to make it easier to swallow?

I can feel all your love and prayers and thankyou everyone for your well wishes and kind support.
Love Colleen

[Carolina]

Oh dearest  Colleen,

The worst of it has so many components. 

Angel, it isn't over.

It has just begun.   Thank god we do it only one day and night at a time.

BE a burden, let people  help you.   It is a gift to others to accept their help.

You will need to share your thoughts and feeling, especially about your beloved Bill.

To relive your life with Bill, to share your memories and sorrow, this will be a need for YEARS.

Please come here to share with us, or even with me in messages.

You will need to share for so long, it is so important for you to do that.

Please keep sharing.

Kisses

Elaine

[amberjolie1]

I am so sorry to hear about your husband.  Big hugs to you.  I hope you have someone who can help you through this, like a family member or good fried.  I don't really have any good advice, having not gone through what you are going through, but the other posts seem to be giving good advice.

[CAT1962]

Oh, Bopeep..I am so, so sorry!  I don't even know what to tell you. It takes time, is the only thing I can think of. I will certainly keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Please, stay in touch here.....

[sissyjane]

I'm so, so sorry. You and your family will be in my prayers.